Macarena (Bayside Boys Remix) or Anxiety and Music Mix Well


For some reason I am feeling a lot of anxiety, only a few days into my spring break.  I do not function very well without an established routine.  If something in my routine is off then it makes me feel out of control.  And if being socialized into the American or Western culture has taught me anything it is the importance of being in control.  Or at least that is what is sold to us.  "If you are in control then you have all of the power, and things will go swimmingly for you!", we are told.  

Anyway, back to my dysfunction.  I am currently locked in my bedroom because even the most minimal of social interaction at the moment makes me want to scratch myself, literally.  Crazy, yeah.  I guess.  I think I am just an extreme introvert and have had way more human interaction than I can handle; damn coffee and caffeine...I have consumed so much coffee today.  This time change has me out of sorts.  I feel like how a snow globe must feel after it has just been shaken: swirly, limited visibility, lost, cold.  

But, I am listening to Wrabel's "Bloodstain" and that has lifted my spirits somewhat.  Ahh...no, wait....Florence and the Machine just came on ("Shake it Out")...every demon wants its pound of flesh...it's always darkest before the dawn...I am always dragging that horse around.  Tonight I am going to bury that horse in the ground.  

I need to get a handle on my tornado.  How do you lasso a tornado?  Lots of tranquilizers I guess, haha, but the strongest I take is Dollar General brand sleeping pills.  Sigh, but those leave me hungover all the next day.  I think I shall start a new book tonight.  No TV though; that revs up the engines too much.  

Time to go kidnap my Kitty. 

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