Ramblings of An Aging Gay Guy

I found out yesterday that I have been approved for Ryan White!  That means any day now I will receive my ID card, which will enable me to order my meds.  Being the pessimistic person that I tend to be means I will not be truly comfortable or relieved until my meds are in my hand (or more accurately, in my stomach).  I plan on asking my doctor if I can go back to my twice-a-day regimen of Truvada/Isentress though.  I feel like I am having too many unpleasant side effects on the Stribild that I have been taking. It has been a rough couple of months being off my meds.  My fatigue is as bad, but I had fatigue when I was on my meds, so that is not so different from before.  But, I have felt more sick being off my meds.  Just today I noticed that my MRSA infection has returned.  That has caused one of the lymph nodes in my hip to swell up and cause a great deal of pain, so I found out when I leaned up against my kitchen counter.  Ouch!  Ver...

Every day I am more tired than the day before.  And yet, I can not become sleepy at a reasonable time.  I lay in my bed with the vague notion that I SHOULD be in bed, but then I stay up reading.  It is as if I am incapable of doing what is rational and necessary, as in going to bed at a decent hour. I am not sure how much of my exhaustion is due to being off my meds or due to my crappy sleep patterns.  I truly believe most of it is due to the meds, because I feel the same exact way even if I have had several nights of good, long sleep.  On the weekends I feel the same way. Last night I woke up in the middle of the night.  I moved into the spare bedroom so that I can sleep with the ceiling fan and the box fan on.  I have to have a fan of some sort on in the spring or summer so that my night sweats don’t get out of control.  When I got up to go to the other room, I barely had the strength to pick up and carry my pillows, and I stumbled into t...